I have to note this down before I forget.
We never really stopped T from having her candies and ice cream as long she has them in moderation. (OK, I have to admit, I have never been able to stop Daddy from offering them to her). Fortunately, T seems to have good self control over these things. Somehow, I feel this is in some ways related to our eating habits at home. We never force her to eat more than she reasonably needs to in her proper meals. If she tells us she has enough, and we see that she has had her reasonable amount of rice or noodles or whatever she is having for her meal, we let her stop. We don't insist that everything on the plate needs to be finished. If she has poor appetite for a day or two, she usually eats more later in the week. Now, even when she is having lollies, chocolate or ice cream, she will stop when she has had enough. I've never seen her gorge herself with them. In fact, after she has had her piece or two and feels that she has had enough, she will give the rest back to us and say "I have enough".
After she past 2 years old, we didn't stop her from having her candies and ice cream. But I do keep an eye to see that she doesn't have an over dose. However, we do make it a habit that she only indulges in them after her meals. If she asks for candy around meal time, I will always tell her "Sure, you can have your candy, but you have to finish your dinner / lunch first. After that, you can have all the candy you want." After some time, she becomes very familiar with the concept and only asks for her snacks after she has finished her meals.
This evening, she has finished her dinner and mine was in the midst of being served. She was sucking happily on her choco vanilla chuppa chup lolly. I haven't had a chuppa chup in ages and asked her if I could have some of hers. She paused for a moment and thought about it seriously (no joking, she really knitted her brows and think) and her reply was
"Er... OK, but you finish your dinner first OK."
I was embarrassed. But on the good side, I am also glad that she managed to think carefully about the action and responsed appropriately. Hopefully, this means that she is able to be responsible independantly.
2 weeks ago